All clothing attracts cat hair in direct proportion to the degree of colour difference between the cat hair and the fabric colour

A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest unless acted upon by some outside force such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

All cats must sleep with people wherever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved as is possible for the cat.

A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap taken.

A cat can make its body long enough to reach about any countertop which has anything remotely interesting on it.

No rug may remain in its natural state if a cat is present

A cats interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to interest him

If a cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat.

Turn on an electric blanket and a cat will jump into bed at the speed of light

All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond

Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity

A cats desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture

It is not possible to predict where a cat actually is, only the probability of where it "might" be

Cats think that if they cant see you, then you cant see them.

Although a cat can hear a tin of Tuna being opened at a mile away, they cant hear a command from three feet away

As yet undiscovered